Sitting still. The hardest part of early motherhood.
Sitting still. “Still” as in “without ceasing” (still here, in the same cross-legged position, on the same floral couch) and “still” as in “without movement” (still as a statue, or in this case, still as a mama trying not to wake her child).
Sitting. Good for road trips, movie theaters, and classrooms. Best if the duration is limited to 120 minutes. Best if interspersed with activity, adventure, and socializing.
But sitting still is part and parcel of motherhood, and we don’t always get to choose how long, where, or with whom. Sometimes it’s lonely, long, and tedious.
It’s not the physical act of sitting still so much as the emotional and spiritual burden. Am I moving forward in life? Am I accomplishing, connecting, becoming? Jesus came “that we might have life more abundantly” (John 10:10). But am I living? Abundantly?
Perhaps He is the secret to successful sitting. Without Him—without His Spirit—sitting still means excessive social media, indulgent eating, and crabby wife syndrome. With Him, it means scripture study, phone calls to friends, and gratitude for my child. Living rather than idling. I can learn, pray, and improve relationships from a sitting position. Perhaps most of all, I can hold my baby—my Lucy, whom I prayed for, waited for, longed for. I can thank God for her, and remember that this is but a season.*
*Ha! This butt season is but a season.