I fast once a month as a religious exercise. I skip two meals, pray with purpose, and donate money to the needy. In theory, it’s a great practice. But I’ll be honest: I love food. Aaand sometimes I’d rather not fast. But when I commune with God, I remember that fasting is not hungering from something so much as it is hungering for something. The conversation goes something like this:

Me: I’m hungry.

God: Yes, I know.

Me: You’re sure I need to skip meals to commune with you? I’m a lot nicer when my blood sugar is moderated. (Aaaaaand there’s a chocolate bundt on the counter).

God: But you said you’re hungry.

Me: I am (sigh) . . . not just physically. I’m really struggling.

God: Tell me.

Me: It’s hard. I don’t really know what to fast for, but my soul is languishing. I can’t tell what’s wrong.

God: Maybe start with what you desire?

Me: I desire … friendship. To be a peace in my marriage. Purpose. Affirmation. Something to strive for.

God. That’s a good list. I want those things for you too….Tell me, what are you thankful for?

Me: My girls! Of course. And safety. Plenty of food, gentle temperatures, books, rain, physical health, a kind community.

God: You’re welcome.

Me: Thanks. It feels good to worship You.

God: I love you, too.

God: Tell me, how are your brothers and sisters?

Me: I’m going to write to Lori and see if jail visits are allowed yet. And Jennifer made me a cross-stitch! I want to visit her. I wonder if Jess could use a phone call this week?

God: You’re a good sister. Thanks for watching out for your siblings.

Me: It’s my pleasure.

Me: God?

God: Yes?

Me: Thanks for the visit. This was good. I guess I can wait on the chocolate bundt for now.

God: It’s a kind offering. I love you. Let’s talk again soon.